 |
The White Bear |
A few years ago, a colleague of
mine was diagnosed with Leukemia. All of her
friends rallied around her trying to find ways
to make the journey she had to take easier for
her. Some of us were able to sit with her while
she went through all of the things she must
in order to survive. Some of us, myself included,
couldn’t sit – we just didn’t
have the stamina to stay in one spot for very
long – we needed to move!
I felt like I wasn’t sharing my responsibility
to support my friend. I have always hated hospitals
and have never been able to spend more than
few minutes “visiting”. I felt guilty,
and tried to force myself to “be there”
for her. But it wasn’t my strength and
I squirmed as she cheerfully submitted to those
unmentionable things she needed to do to beat
the demons that were invading her body.
How strong she was, how determined she was
to survive. I admired her, and I looked for
ways to help her. I brought her books, a journal,
colourful scarves to cover her head that suddenly
had lost all of her wonderful red hair. My friend
had been an image consultant, it was important
to her to look good, she knew that looking good,
made her feel better.
Sometimes life works in mysterious ways. I
received a newspaper from a Northern Ontario
business associate, in the newspaper was a story
about a woman who had been diagnosed with Cancer
and survived, with the help of a white bear.
The magazine article was written from the perspective
of her daughter who, like me, didn’t know
what she could do to help her mother. She just
knew the result must be the destruction of the
disease – her mother must live!
The story unfolds………..the
young woman was sitting in a restaurant in Belleville,
Ontario. She had just been to visit her mother
who was not progressing well. She was in the
hospital submitting to the Chemotherapy that
could save her life, but the doctors were not
very hopeful. Her daughter was willing to try
anything. She drank her coffee and she prayed
for help.
As she sipped her coffee, she felt a hand on
her shoulder – she turned and saw a native
Canadian who looked at her and said “
your mother is very sick, but she will survive
if you find her a white bear.” The young
woman looked at the man and asked where she
could find a “white bear”. He smiled
shrugged his shoulders, and move away without
answering her.
She remembered that there was a store in Belleville
that sold native artifacts. She left the restaurant,
and went quickly to the store, and there in
window were two small white bears made of ivory!
She bought them and she took them to her mother.
She told her the story and together they prayed
for the strength they needed.
Within a few days, there was a noticeable change
in her response to the therapy and she began
to get stronger…… overtime she went
into complete remission and never goes anywhere
without her “white bears”.
As I read the article, I looked up, and on
my computer was a white bear, not an ivory one,
but one from Belleville, given to me by someone
from a group I’d spoken to. Was it from
a native Canadian? I don’t know, but it
was a white bear. I quickly picked up the bear,
copied the article and went to visit my friend
in the hospital. I told her the story and said
this little bear was especially for her and
it would be just like the one in the story.
My friend took the bear and it sat on her tray,
it was always there. She went through a great
deal during the next few months, and she said
that knowing the bear was always watching over
her, helped her get through it all.
Well she made it, she was in remission and
the bear was still with her…….I
found another white bear, that year and I gave
it to her for Christmas – I felt that
you can never have too many white bears!
My friend became part of what is called the
“Look Good, Feel Better” program,
giving others hope that they too can survive.
I think she took her bear with her when she
told her story.
What is the reason for the need to tell the
story of the White Bear?
I don’t really know, it might be that
everyone needs a little white bear in times
of stress and great need.
It is my belief that all of us need to have
that special talisman that we can hold on to
when the journey gets difficult. I may not have
been able to be with my friend in the hospital,
but the little white bear was there……and
it helped her.
Was it the white bear, the support of her friends,
the chemo, her constitution or her determination
to make it that helped her? Who knows…………..
I found out through my Aboriginal friends that
the “bear” is very special for me
– that I should always carry the talisman
with me. My bear is drawn on a little stone
that is always in my purse or pocket. Whenever
the journey gets a little difficult, I think
about my friend and her little white bear………..
Donna Messer
Web
site designed and developed by InterDream Designs |
